MAILBOX [ #0998 ]

[destructiveprinciple]

 [ It's empty. ]

Comments

[destructiveprinciples]

[ It's hardly Avenger's fault that the boy she'd known had been even more tool-ish than a normal Emiya would typically be okay The reaches of the giant, vaulted chamber were nowhere near silent even now, at the very crack of morning where this floor's creatures were no threat to either of them; a distant watery breeze, and the echoing of underground noise through winding tunnels. ]

Uh-huh. [ He raises up from where he'd been crouching on his haunches to stand upright on his care feet. Folding his arm across his chest, Avenger leans forward slightly. More than a trace of cheerful taunting threads through his voice; ]

What do you think I mean? [ Then he leans back, sighing to himself and eyes briefly sliding shut. They open again. ] I mean, it's hard to communicate with people unless I nab a decent shell, and he happened to fit the bill.

[ He'd got soaked in the contents of the Holy Grail without dying an instant, painful death that one time, and that was enough to qualify as contact since the idiot hadn't been a Heroic Spirit. Plus, the Servant been looking for somebody to keep the ball rolling during the time loops. ]

[no_longer_a_king]

[Well, that's the hilarious part about this whole situation: none of it is actually Avenger's fault. None. But she thinks she understands what he means about Shirou fitting the bill. He had not touched the Grail in her world, but there is no reason why he couldn't in a world where she had not taken his head.

Saber shifts her weight from one foot to the other and tries to force herself to stand straighter. It's hard, yes, to stand here, to be around him, but damn it. She deserves answers. At least he's willing to provide them!]

I just find it odd someone such as you could pretend to be Shirou so well. [How does such a rude person manage to act just like him? What little she has seen of Avenger tells her he either put a lot more effort into his masquerade than he wanted or there was something else going on than simply taking someone's form. If she hadn't been expecting it, seeing Shirou's face--Shirou's body--move in such a way would have sent her reeling.

Then again, considering the last few weeks? It had. More than she cared to admit, but had to own up to.]

Or is there more to it than taking on his appearance?

[destructiveprinciple]

[ Which is a hilariously unintentionally reoccurring theme in his life. Avenger's posture isn't as forcibly straight as hers; he slouches a little with his shoulders a thick lazy line that curved downward, a casualness or carelessness to the way he holds himself and he moves very little. In the cavernous darkness of the floor, he remains still and looks unerringly at Saber. Her tension isn't hidden.

It was fortunate he had a tendency to be honest when people thought to ask the correct questions, it really was. He cocks his head to the side. ]

Pretend? [ And unfortunately Avenger had a very weird ideal of what counted as fake and what counted as real, which was probably more than a little confusing when his definition of it seemed to mix the two up. He said it was a disguise, but he was a shadow without form to begin with. Nothing can't turn into something, nor can it imitate anything.

So—even if he took shape by using somebody's body, he was still no more than nothing. He couldn't influence the host. ]

Hah. You could say that. Even though I was a fake, those actions were the real thing's idiotic sentiments.

[no_longer_a_king]

[Which is horribly appropriate given his actual life in general. She knows her tension isn't hidden, even if she does her best. In this situation it's impossible for her to keep it completely so. Between the sickly aura practically radiating off Avenger, his resemblance to Shirou, and how surreal it is to see even someone who resembles Shirou to slouch and speak in such a manner is unnerving.

Ruana could only hope to mess with her mind as much as speaking with Avenger does for her. Nothing Ruana ever did drove Arturia to want to erase her memory simply because she wanted some form of peace for once in her long existence.]

So, when you take on Shirou's face, for all intents and purposes you are Shirou? Are you even aware of yourself at all when that happens?

[It makes sense, in a way. Not that Arturia realizes Avenger is essentially nothingness incarnate, but because of how close he was to mimicking Shirou. Too close, in fact. The slight differences she could still attribute to the Shirou who reached the Grail being of another world than hers.]

[sixbillionsins]

[ He claps his hands together, the sound echoing sharply off the vaulted rock and the sand under their feet, the lively look on his face as unapologetic as it can be. ]

You figured it out, good for you!

[ Avenger shifts his weight a little, from one foot to the other.

His obscene and uncomfortable mannerisms that are so opposite of Shirou's attitude aside, the fact that she is deeply repulsed and disgusted by his horrible aura escapes his notice in a way her ill-concealed tension does not. Her steady composure is kept and whose who are affected by the taint that basically radiates off tend to give some sort of vocal or physical acknowledgment of it. ]

[no_longer_a_king]

[With how tense she is, the sound of the clap followed by how lively he is about her guessing correctly, makes her jump, one hand flexing to summon Caliburn. She only manages a spark of light before forcing herself to stop. Even if he acts absolutely nothing like Shirou, the image of Shirou's head rolling on the ground washes across her mind, forcing her to stay her hand.

Avenger is being an ass, not attacking her. Even his aura, sickening as it is, is not doing anything malicious beyond making her feel ill. It's very likely this entire meeting will go without her acknowledging its effect on her.]

And I asked if you were aware of yourself at all. Do not avoid the question: What happened when I took you out to fight to make you drop the charade?

["You." Not Shirou. She doubts she'll be able to look "Shirou" in the face again. The question gnaws at her: should she tell him? Make him aware? Or would Avenger prevent it from happening? Does this mean all those months of training and eating together and slowly but surely getting to know one another as people for nothing?]

[sixbillionsins]

[ There's a brief flicker of amusement from him when she starts like that, her hand going for a weapon before it forcibly jerks to an halt and stops, stilling again. How aggravating this must be for Saber. He doesn't attack. He has no intentions of attacking, not in this situation, since his aggressions were passive; he wouldn't lash out unless somebody else made the first move. It was his preference for conduct in a fight.

Avenger waited for an enemy to come towards him, he took what damage he had to endure, and then he struck back. ]

That wasn't an answer? Then I'll clarify for ya': nope. I'm not, not when that's happening. [ The Servant grimaces inwardly a little. Honestly, Avenger would have skipped the fight with Archer weeks before and several other similarly ill-fated incidents if he could, but he hadn't had a say in it. Then he shrugs. ]

Oh, that? If it'll get you off my back for it. . . I ran out of prana.

[ '-' he would have laster longer if he had been using that charade, and draining bits of energy to maintain the illusion of the orange hair, and the warm hazel eyes, and the unmarked, pale skin. ]

[no_longer_a_king]

I see.

[Prana Shirou ran out of because she had underestimated how they'd be swarmed.

Prana Shirou ran out of because she had thought him ready to come monster hunting with her.

Prana Shirou needed to maintain the illusion, but was it really worth it if it was all a lie?

Arturia takes a step back and crosses her arms for the sake of something to do with her hands. Part of her wants to ask if he'll be continuing the charade, but she cannot bring herself to ask. She isn't sure if she wants the answer to be yes or no.]

Thank you for answering my questions. I do appreciate it.

[destructiveprinciples]

Hm, do you?

[ It's said impassively, without the casually inflammatory edge he spoken for the majority of this meeting, an eyebrow quirking up on his forehead as she retreats one step backward, away from him and crosses her arms. The sand crunched under her feet.

Avenger takes a step forward, but no closer than that; ]

Alrighty. Are you satisfied then, Saber?

[ He doesn't bother with 'you're welcome.' ]

[no_longer_a_king]

For now, yes.

[More because she has taken all she can tolerate from this exercise for the moment. Between the aura, the attitude, and the resemblance, she's half afraid she'll snap and do something she'll regret once more.]

If I have further questions, I will seek you out.

[And she turns to leave.]

[sixbillionsins]

[ He crackles softly, the noise again echoing off the rock and the sands and bouncing around the cavern, before fading quickly, muffled by the trickle of running water.

To her turned back: ]

Of course, of course.

Be seeing ya' later then.

[ The abrupt disappearance of presence that usually indicated a Servant slipping into spirit mode followed, along with a decrease in that sickly, disgusting pressure, and nothing stops her from turning to leave. ]